Bitter, Table for Two

My friend Eddie and I were recently discussing (via email, because we both spend an inordinate amount of time at sitting at desks) some of our pet peeves regarding Facebook status updates. We came up with a short list.

Facebook Status Updates We Don't Want to See:

1. Stay-at-home moms lamenting: a) their high level of stress; b) how difficult their lives are; or c) how much they need a vacation.

Are you kidding me? Let's trade jobs for a week, and then you'll THINK "need a vacation."

2. Incremental updates about the minute details of someone's life, such as: "Lisa is craving chicken salad for lunch," quickly followed by "Lisa is at the deli buying chicken salad," quickly followed by "Lisa is eating chicken salad like it's her job!"

No one effing cares, people.

3. People who don't work telling us how they're spending this beautiful day (e.g., taking their dogs to the park, tanning in the backyard, or cruising around with the top down).

Thanks for telling me how nice it is outside; I had no idea, from down here in my window-less dungeon office.

But we're not bitter.