Why are break-ups so much harder for women than they are for men? Most of the time, the girl is probably better off without the guy anyway, yet we seem to suffer so much more from the loss.
As a matter of fact, I can't think of any girls I know (and I don't know that many girls, but still) who are really able to break up with a guy, unless they already have someone "waiting in the wings." Or, at least, unless they have another prospect. Guys, on the the other hand, are able to quit their relationships "cold turkey." Cut and run. Never look back.
Why the discrepancy?
Personally, I've always had my ex-boyfriend "Bud," to fall back on, when the going got rough. Until now. This time, I'm having to go through it on my own, and let me tell you: It is NOT EASY. (In case you were wondering, Bud finally got tired of that role, as well he should have.)
I'm starting to understand what it means to be "jaded." (J-j-jaded....)
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8 comments:
Oh I think you'll get some comments from guys who disagree with you on this. Guys?
Candy, sorry to hear, sad for you.
That's basically what I wanted to say, but phillyone called us out, so I will add that it's not always that easy from the guy's point of view, either... Relationships are tough, period.
Chin up. Hang in there.
-E-
I certainly disagree. It's all about the power balance. There's always someone in control. The person who's clinging on will never end it. Thus your subjective experience here is simply a reflection of the common state of mind of your groups of friends.
It does suck, either way, until you meet the right person!
(Hi from an English 'attorney')
I think the reason it might seem easier for men is because we don't typically have someone waiting in the wings after we dump a girl.
With that said, men grow thicker skin about the trauma of losing a girlfriend and learn to be a lot more independent.
However, the notion that we don't seem to suffer is pretty much untrue in itself (even though it might SEEM like it's true). Men suffer, we just hide it better.
Also, I'm kinda disgusted by the idea that women have a man waiting on standby for when they dump their current boyfriend. I know it's a fact of life, but it really takes the sincerity out of all the suffering you claim to go through after a breakup.
"Also, I'm kinda disgusted by the idea that women have a man waiting on standby for when they dump their current boyfriend. I know it's a fact of life, but it really takes the sincerity out of all the suffering you claim to go through after a breakup"
I completely agree.
I actually disagree with you to an extent about it being easier for guys. I know that I've broken up with someone before just because we weren't right together, and it was so hard, because he was devastated. He knew that we were getting married, and it was tough.
So...I don't know that it's easier, though girls do seem to struggle with it more and even if it's not right, they tend to be upset over a break-up.
You are a thousand times the woman that he deserves.
-W
I'm discouraged by your remark that girls never break up with a guy unless they have someone waiting in the wings. I'd like to think that I've been broken up with because the relationship wasn't going better, not because someone got a better offer. I will say that i do prefer to quiting relationships cold turkey, then spend some time alone. If i don't do it cold turkey then things drag on for longer than they should and they will never get back to where they started anyhow.
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