Sigh.

Out of curiosity, I Googled "trashiest baby names." I'll give you three guesses as to which name is the reigning champ.

I'd like to thank the Academy, Jesus, and, of course, good ole Mom and Dad, without whom I wouldn't have the World's Trashiest Name.

I'd also like to thank all the Tiffany's, Brandy's, Misty's, and Chastity's. I mean, as we all know, it was an honor just to be nominated.

I'll see y'all at the strip club later.