Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Highlights

I've decided to adopt a new M.O., which I'm stealing from a former fellow law student's "About Me" section on her Facebook profile. (You know what they say: Plagiarism is the sincerest form of flattery.)

The M.O.: Take life two days at a time.

The Rationale: Taking life one day at a time is a recipe for failure. If you only think about today, then you'll end up feeling really bad about those thirteen Oreos you just ate, or the fact that, instead of going to the gym after work like you'd planned, you went out with the girls and drank five vodka-and-cranberry's. But, if you take life two days at a time...well, there's always tomorrow.

And speaking of going out with the girls, for our Post-Bar Exam Weekend, Frenchy and I engaged in a LOT of drinking and debauchery. To help us celebrate, Midge came in from Johnson City, and Frenchy's friends "Bubbles" and "Cookie" drove down from Kentucky. Here are a few highlights from the weekend:

Friday night, Wild Wing Cafe

Frenchy (drunkenly) decides that she needs individual pictures of everyone in the group (including our waiter) showing off their biceps. Not surprisingly, Candy's picture is the most pitiful.

Candy (drunkenly) informs the (same) waiter that, if he does not hurry up and send the hot bartender over to the table to say hi, she will KICK HIS ASS. I'm pretty sure this is never a good thing to say to a waiter, much less to a waiter who just showed you his massive, tattoo-covered biceps.

Somehow a picture of Candy's "cleavage" has ended up in "Fred's" phone. Sadly, this one is just as pitiful as her bicep picture.

Frenchy, apparently thinking that the group is just not drunk enough, decides to use Candy's umbrella as a Beer Holder, in order to sneak a couple of To Go Beers out of the bar.

While Candy is (thankfully) having an uneventful drive home, Bubbles, Cookie, and Frenchy stop by Steak n Shake for some burgers. While ordering at the drive-thru, Bubbles not only orders food that is not on the menu, but she also tells Cookie and Frenchy to "shut up" mid-order, leading the drive-thru girl to believe Bubbles is talking to her. Drive-thru girl responds, "Okaaaay...."

Upon arriving home, Candy decides to call her ex-boyfriend, whom she had just seen earlier that day, to inform him just how bad his hair looked. Hehe, whoops.

Saturday night, Hanna's

Frenchy (drunkenly) begins answering every incoming call as if she's a 1-900 number. And this is a lot of calls.

Bubbles (drunkenly) falls on her ass on the dance floor, which is not so much embarrassing as it is ICKY. Candy, for one, has just spilled the top third of her Sex on the Beach on that same floor, after being violently shoved by a three-hundred-pound bride-to-be, who was out for her bachelorette party.


By one a.m., Bubbles and Cookie are nowhere to be found. Frenchy is upstairs dancing (and living up to her name, no doubt). Candy doesn't mind at all that she's been left "alone."

At Last Call, the girls call their Hot Chauffeur to come pick them up. While they're waiting, Bubbles "takes one for the team" and scores the girls a free pizza for the ride home. Candy finds alternate transportation.

(That's all I can share about the weekend...I have to protect the innocent. And by "innocent," I mean "guilty.")

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

When you say Bubbles "took one for the team" it sounds a lot like she blew the guy for a pizza. Did she?

Candy said...

Well, I can't really say what happened because I wasn't there...but...it was a pizza, after all.

Anonymous said...

So.....what's her number?

Frenchy said...

Well I was not present at the pizza buying negotiations but I am sure that she did not enter into an "oral" contract for the pizza.

Candy said...

Thanks for clearing that up, Frenchy. And as for you, "anonymous," there will be NO asking for numbers on my blog. Unless, of course, you're asking for MY number. Legally Brunette not a frigging dating service.
:)